Identity Crisis w/ Anastasia Washington

Michele reveals that she’s going to couples therapy with her boyfriend. AND she’s using insurance to pay for it, now that she no longer prescribes to the myth of “the permanent record.”

This week’s guest is Anastasia Washington (@anastasiawash), a podcaster, actress, and comedian. She tells us about her anxiety disorder, finding her therapist soulmate, growing up a child actor, being typecast as the “quirky best friend,” and accepting that she wants to be the main character in her own life, dammit! Anastasia shares her experience of being biracial in LA, having an identity crisis over it, and writing a one-woman show called 50 Shades of Mixed. She also shares tips for overcoming writer’s block. 

Follow Therapy Roulette!

IG: @therapyroulettepod

Twitter: @TherapyRoulette

YouTube channel: Therapy Roulette

Write in to the pod! therapyroulette@gmail.com

Check out 50 Shades of Mixed, coming to Solo Fest at the Whitefire Theatre 

Follow Anastasia Washington!

IG:  @anastasiawash

Twitter: @anastasiaw

Follow Michele Baci!

IG: @michelebacicomedy

Twitter: @michelebaci

Theme music by @hannahvsthemany

Listen to Hannah Vs. The Many:

https://open.spotify.com/artist/5rlyuj1AOlLdLCV5MRFc9P?si=muDK4Rr3RXWMGhBCP0fQaw

Transcript

Therapy Roulette: Consent to Vent / Trauma disguised as comedy / Therapy Roulette: Consent to Vent / If you don’t have problems, then you’re likely repressing sh*t and you should find a therapist / (Who’s not me)

Hey, everyone,

its Michele Baci, I am back with another episode of Therapy Roulette can set to vent. So last week, I told you I was about to meet with a new therapist. And what I did not reveal was is actually a couples counselor. So my boyfriend Joseph and I went to a couples counselor over zoom. And I'm really glad we did it were, we currently are two sessions in and it will stick with it for like, the length of whatever program the counselor has in mind. We're, we're learning the Gottman method, which is supposed to help couples get better at communication, decreasing verbal conflict, and overall, bring you closer together through empathy and increasing your understanding of each other. It's a lot of I statements, and having one person talk one person, listen, and then make sure that each other actually heard what the other one was saying. And I think we really made the right move deciding to do couples therapy, because especially in quarantine, we've been getting into these like cyclical arguments that are literally the same argument over and over and they're always in, they always lie in these petty issues like household chores, doing the dishes. I don't know I have a problem with like, tone of voice and just general language, like what words are used that can set me off because I'm a big word person, big English nerd. So I think learning the Gottman method and having this Professional Counselor tell us how to effectively communicate, that's really going to help our relationship. So I'm excited that we're doing it. I couldn't believe how easy the whole process has been since we got started. We put it off for a little while. I wanted to start doing couples therapy because my friend, and her boyfriend did it recently during the quarantine. And she said it really helped her and I was like, Oh my god, I should do that too. Because honestly, I think the problem Joseph and I just run into over and over again is we can't communicate well, when we're when we're annoyed or when we're angry. We like hit these walls, and then we both feel stuck. So I'm really glad we're doing it. The way we found the therapist was we wanted to go through insurance because we're practical adults. And I'm new. I'm new to using insurance for therapy axes to believe like, Oh, no, it's gonna be on my permanent record. But I think that's you know, it's another lie. They tell you to scare you like you don't want this on your permanent record. Do you like maybe that can affect your whatever your pre existing conditions and like, maybe possibly an employer, future employer could see like, Oh, you were diagnosed with this mental illness, but I don't I've never heard of that actually happening. So I think it's one of those permanent record lies they tell you like in school and the principal's like, this will go on your permanent record, like no one's looking at any record, dude, like there's so many kids in the school, there's no way you're keeping detailed files on all

500 students.

So I don't think they're doing that very well. Unless you're an extreme case, I think going to couples counseling will not prevent me from getting a future job. So we went through our insurance website and found a few people who looked decent, whether because they were close to us in case we wanted to see them in a post COVID worlds like they would be close by. Or they had one or two good reviews, websites like Sock Doc health grades, even our insurance website, there's profiles of all the doctors and there's options to leave them reviews, there's usually not a lot of reviews, like we we ended up choosing a therapist who had one or two positive reviews, like very few. But I think you can get a good sense of what a doctor is like based on really one review, like unless you read the review, and you're like, Oh, this person is a little unhinged. If you think the review is sound, you can probably gather whether or not you want to meet that therapist. So it's going well I'll let you know how it's going in the future. I am also seeking a therapist for myself and I have an appointment with a new doctor next week over phone call not not even zoom which is actually better for me because I am coming out of having a talkspace therapist and just doing messaging. So a phone call is like a bigger step for me. And I think you really learn a lot over phone call. Like I think I might be able to better express myself because I won't feel I'm being watched. And because Joseph and I live in this tiny apartment, and I want total privacy, and I'm kind of, I don't know, I just don't want anyone to be able to listen to me whether it's Joseph or like a neighbor, or the Amazon's delivery guy, I want total privacy and my therapy session. So I think I'm just going to go out to our car, which is parked on the street and take my phone call in the car. I think it'll go well, but I'm really excited because I haven't had a therapist since like October. And now it's January. So I feel like I've been bottling up a lot of stuff. And my anxiety has not been quenched at all my anxiety is just building because we live in the pandemic. And I don't know how to deal with anxiety in the first place. So I'm hoping I can learn how to manage that and learn how to just like quiet my worrying minds from this new therapist. Thank you so much for listening to Therapy Roulette, I hope you are enjoying it so far. Please write me an email to let me know literally anything I mostly want to know. You know, if you have any therapy problems, if you have a bad therapist, if you have a good therapist, what you think if the podcast, you can write any of that stuff to be at Therapy roulette@gmail.com and I will either read your email on air and maybe roast you a tiny bit keeping your name anonymous unless you say, Hey, my name is Michele let the world know unless you say explicitly tell my name. I will keep you anonymous. Write me an email, or you can DM me on twitter on Instagram Therapy Roulette. All the handles are in the show notes. On Instagram. We are at Therapy Roulette pod. And on Twitter. We're just at Therapy Roulette. And you can also follow me, Michele Baci, my handles are in the show notes too. And one thing I really want to stress is please, please, please, if you like the podcast, leave us a review on the apple podcast app, because that is the way people find podcasts. If they see a lot of positive reviews. It really helps like generate traffic to the podcast and help strangers to find it. So leave me a positive review. It could be like one sentence long, it could be a word doesn't matter. Five stars, please. If you think I'm five star worthy, and that'd be awesome. It would put some good karma out there. You know, this week's guest is Anastasia Washington. She is an actress, a podcaster comic, and we have really fun conversation about her history of being a child actor. And now a biracial woman living in Los Angeles. I'd like to welcome Anastasia Washington! 

guest interview / a friend for you / strangers whose issues are relatable / guest interview / They're the voice that's new / this person has problems and they don't mind discussing it, but they still need a therapist / (Who’s not me) 

Anastasia. Welcome to the podcast. How are you doing?

I'm doing good. How are you?

Good. Well, as good as you can be, you know?

Yeah, I'm like on automatic. Yes, I'm doing good.

That's great. I have not been like that

the whole pandemic.

I'm always like,

I'm fine.

I'm doing fine. I'm, I'm alive. I'm like, very upset to have to answer that question. I don't know why I put it on my guests. I'm glad you're doing good.

I mean, it's like it's, it's like an automatic answer to me. Like, my whole life. Everything's good. I'm great.

It's always kind of Yeah, like lifting toward optimistic.

Yeah, I think it's also just like the performer in me. It's like, Yes, everything is great. Aren't you happy? I'm happy.

Yeah, and then I feel that for you, and I'm like, okay, I could do that too. Maybe I could be happy

too. It's contagious, like, the pandemic. Like the COVID. Like the pandemic of happiness that we deserve.

So you were telling me, you're in therapy? How is that going?

Um, I think it's like finding your soulmate. Right? I feel like I have found about my therapy soulmate. And it's great. I love I love it. I'm so excited.

I'm so jealous. How did you find your soulmate? through this, like psychology window?

I, you know, it took a long time, because I've been in therapy off and on since I was a kid. And I feel like, you know, there was times that a therapist was great for me for a while. And then, you know, there's something in your life that changes and you just don't mesh anymore or something.

And this one, you might outgrow the therapy,

you can outgrow it's like it's like any relationship right and I and so, in in the therapy world, I've dated a lot and

I'm ready to settle down. Yeah, I

feel like that analogy is spot on because I I kind of like skirt around therapists myself. I don't stay with anyone too long. And that's been most of my dating history too. So I feel like it just like relationship patterns, right? Yeah. But now, now you have a soulmate therapist, how long has it been? How'd you find this person?

So about two, two years now. So before the pandemic and stuff like that, I feel like I knew he was the one when I walked in there. And I was like, Oh, my God, I'm so anxious about telling you about my anxiety. Within like, a couple of minutes, I was calm. I was like, wow, this is this is this is great. So I was got easy a did it was it was just like, I don't know, I didn't feel weird. Like, I think people with anxiety disorders, we always kind of feel like weird for feeling things. And I didn't feel weird. You know, some of you didn't, yeah, I

feel I definitely have my own experience with anxiety. And it's always like, you know, it's an obstacle. And you know, it's like, present in your life. But I struggled to like, know what to do about it. So it's always like, I know, this is holding me back. But also, I have the anxiety. So it's like you're combating it in real time, pretty often.

Oh, yeah. I mean, one of my favorite statements to say to my mom, often is like, I know that this is completely rational, and not based in anything factual, but I feel like blah, blah, you know, and she'll be like, Well, okay, acknowledge that it's not rational and not based. And I'm like, Yeah, I know. But I cannot. I can't get out of the feeling until I've acknowledged it, you know?

And it kind of helps you a little bit just to say it,

get it out there to me it does. I mean, not to everybody, to certain people. Like, yeah, to have a boundary because there are those people that are like, yeah, that's weird. And I'm like, I know, I acknowledge that part. Please don't make me feel weird. Or

like, maybe, maybe we're not on that level where I have to know about that.

All right. All right. Well, you know, now we know that you don't want to know that. And

yeah, I will never be close.

That's fine. Could it be friends? Just

that is your therapist? Is your therapist, a man? Or what kind of person are they?

They are a man? Wow.

Yeah. That's rare. Yeah, like a woman seeking a male therapist. You know,

I had female therapists, pretty consistently since I was a kid. And he was my first male therapist. And it worked. I don't know. Maybe I knew that. Wow, maybe I needed but maybe that's like a, maybe that's an energy I needed in my life. I have a very strongly, heavily female family.

So you needed something different?

Like, I need to stab with all the female energy for a moment.

That's cool. What is the best thing about your therapist? Like, what do they do the best?

I mean, I think understanding my lifestyle, because being a comedian, and being in the industry is it's crazy, you know, and then having an anxiety disorder. On top of that, you know, there's some weird spins that that just are kind of inevitable. And so I think understanding my lifestyle, understanding my goals, and understand and listening to the things that are my goals, and really getting it was, was really the most important thing to me. Because I think if you go in there with a therapist, especially in our field, and somebody like, doesn't believe in those goals of yours, like, I don't know, has like kind of like, parent energy. I don't really have I had a parent that was like that, but my mom's not like that. But like, that's like, do something practical, be practical, you know, but this is my life. Like, these are my goals, my career. And so I feel like not having that question. And having that acknowledged was a big relief for me. Do you know, I mean, I don't know if I'm explaining it quite well, but he's used to comedian I guess.

That's important. Like, I feel like I've heard with New York comedians, I've heard a lot of people have the same therapist. Or maybe it's true in LA too, because you hear someone's good with people in your industry. And you want to go to that person because they get it. Yeah, it's there. They're not like why why aren't you in grad school yet? Why aren't you a lawyer yet? Like,

right? And they're just not.

Maybe you'd be happier with a desk job. Exactly.

There's not like this disappointment or push into to so called like, normal type of job. It's like it's already acknowledged that this is my career that I am Good in this career, it's just like navigating this career and, and the stuff that's going on up here. And I feel like I grieve when I found somebody that this is your thing. This is, this is you and your career and I'm like, Yes, it's actually a career.

Yeah, cuz the whole entertainment biz brings its whole set of mental health ailments with it. Or you're like constantly facing rejection or like weird harassment or prejudice, whatever's going on. And it's tenfold compared to like, a desk job, probably because you're just dealing with more rejection on a daily basis. Yeah,

I mean, it's it I, it's probably a completely different set of, like, issues that you get from having a desk job, but also growing up in LA, and being an actor fairly young. There's some stuff that how,

how young were you when you started acting?

So I think my first gig was like three or four. And oh,

my God, you really like learned how to talk and he started acting?

Pretty much. Yeah, like I started singing a lot on soundtracks when I first was really, really little. And then, yeah, never left the field of acting and singing and all that. But it's weird. It's never took him

never took a long break or anything.

teenagehood I feel like, like, mid teens, like I never like, truly walked away from it. But I feel like I had this like Cabbage Patch phase of look. And they didn't quite know, me like a cabbage patch with boobs, and they're like, what's happening? So like, maybe I've heard you say that before. I was like, it's like an unintentional break.

They're like, we don't know how to Ted cast

this. So we don't know. It's

so hard for most of us. Yeah. Yeah. Everyone's like, growing out of their bodies. Yeah.

And it was, you know, I was still active in like, singing and acting. It just wasn't as as successful. I'm looking for fair. Yeah. And also, like, you know, just growing up and not being like, easily checked category. And then going through an awkward phase of just being a teenager. Like, it really like made that box hard for me to fit into. For castability. You know?

Yeah, that casting room was probably like, this is too difficult. We don't we don't want to do this.

Yeah. They're like, we're not ready. Yeah,

what, uh, what drew you to therapy in the first place? If you mind if you don't mind sharing? Oh, like when you were young?

Yeah. I actually started therapy when I was about eight years old because I had an I was attacked. When I was eight. I was almost kidnapped. And so then I did you were attacked. Yeah. Yeah. Somehow somebody tried to throw me in a van. No. Oh, my God. Yeah. And I thought the the ass off. Um, so no way. Yeah. So my parents were like, We should maybe get her in to

help you. Yeah, we should figure out what trauma This is causing?

Yeah, cuz you got to do the identification thing. And I don't know. Like, I started sleepwalking. And turning on all the lights in our house. Just doing weird out of weird shit

out of like, Aftermath shock or so. Yeah.

So they were like, Let's get her into therapy. And so,

yeah, very good. I would say Good job, parents.

Good job. Parents. Very good. You know, Tina, Tina, being a teenager was hard. So like, I just continued it through them. Because there was like, a lot of stuff like my parents eventually separated. I had some identity issues about, like, there's like this pressure when you're biracial to be like, picking a side or like, leaning towards one side. And I didn't quite know what that meant, or like, what my racial identity was allowed to be or what I wanted it to be. And so,

yeah,

I think that cost caused like a lot of angst. I was very angsty, I was very emo. You know, same. Like I grow and I

feel like the identity crisis comes up when you're an adult allowed Ella adolescent because you're like, pressured by your peers to figure out who you are immediately because you have to present like a peacock. You have to present who you are to the school to your friends. Yeah. And then being in LA. All your life you probably have like more so a camera in front of you or like some kind of like other lens looking at you. Yeah, so it's more pressure on you

when you know your category. Really Young like what your castability is? And it's funny if you feel like you're not that, right? Or if you lean into that and completely become your castability, right, like, I was inevitably the best friend and the quirky best friend, right? And for years, like I leaned into that I was, like, even now, like, I'm a great like, wing woman and like cheerleader for people. And I'm, I mean, that's the best character, right? Best Friend, right? It's it's

awkwafina. And crazy, rich Asians, like she made the movie. Exactly.

But there is something about realizing what role you want in your own life, right? If you're the quirky best friend in your life, you're not the lead of your own life. And I had to, it was very recent, that I was like, hey, like, I am great at being a quirky best friend. It's great. But also, like, I could be the lead in my own life, like I could take the lead, and not just say sassy things, and just see what I want. And actually have a like a plot story and not be the see plot.

Because you, you can keep your personality or you can change it for role, but you could always like yeah, see yourself in a lien light? Because that's like, resetting the mental state to be like, no, this

is what I want, right? You go after, right? But when you take like, a backseat to your own life, because you feel like that's the role that you're supposed to be in. It's It's weird. So like, I had to, I had a journey of like, finding who I am, what I want, and still having quirky, sassy, best friend vibes. It's okay to have all that. But it's it's balanced, I guess.

It's kind of strange how the quirky best friend is always like the side character and the quirkiness is almost never in the lead role. It's like, No, we need a normal person in the lead role, or like someone who's like messy up all the time and can't get it together. And then the personalities reserved for like the side character. Yeah.

Which is, which is so true. But it's also like, how much does this does their story move along, right? Like, now we see more of that, but there's still kind of like, what, you know, like, do they get a love interest? Or they get to this? And like, I had to start asking myself that question. Well, if you're, if you're just like, the side character, do you? Like how does your story play out? You can't, you know, like, I have to be the main character of my own life. And I have, I can bring that energy and bring that personality but still have lead character? arcs.

Yeah, in both your real life and acting and comedy, you want to be pursuing the lead role, because that's, that's where the money is. That's where the stardom is. You should never like settle for something. No, no.

And I and I, when I realized that I wasn't always going to be the natural choice for the lead. I started writing my own stuff, because I was like, well, I want to see me do this. And if they don't,

that's where it's at. Make your own stuff.

Yeah, I just started making my own stuff. Although I will say for the first few ones, when I like would write something or everything. My friends were like, you wrote this role for you? And I'm like, yeah, and they're like, you wrote yourself the sassy best friend I was like,

but as Lee Right. I mean, VCs, you see that in more recent things like Broad City, New Girl, those quirky main characters. Yeah. But it's just not as popular as mainstream. Right. So maybe in the future, maybe,

you know, but I think like, yeah, with Broad City with like, insecure, and all these things. These shows all the

better shows

out there like pin 15. Like, yes, I love had so good. So good, like so honest about you has so many things that like sometimes it's even hard to be like, like, oh, to be honest, I went to look away.

Yeah, like, why do we have to see everything? Actually,

I went through.

But I know

it's a little traumatic to watch 1015 because it's, it's like our lives in middle school, probably. And it's like, so on the nose, but like, mature and you're like, ah, like, Don't look away. It's really good television.

It's great television. And when it elicits a response like that, you know, it's great television, and you're like, Oh, yeah, sometimes

you're cringing very good, right? Yeah, like

that whole crap episode. I was like, Oh, that was me. Oh,

I know. I saw myself in so many episodes, and I was like, why did I not know At the time, why does it have to be clear to me now as a 30 year old?

It's insane. I know. But they called us out. And they were like, Hey, this is you. And I was like, yeah.

I'm definitely why watching those two girls now Maya and see what they do next. Oh, I

know.

Like, it's brilliant. It's

brilliant. And I think we're gonna see people try to copy that kind of.

I don't know.

Yeah, everything good. Everything good. People just try to copy. Yeah, for sure. See, you mentioned an identity crisis. And I was looking up like, statistics before we spoke today about biracial people in the world. There's not like, you would think it's a lot more people and it's a pretty small percentage. So do you do you know a lot of people like you who look biracial or like identify as biracial? Or was that kind of like, you were the only one you knew? Who was like, Um, no, yeah, I

know, a lot of biracial I think, especially in acting, we kind of migrated towards each other. Because we Yeah, like, I think in LA, if we see each other, we do the nod. Yeah. Because it is an interesting kind of place to be in. And so when you see somebody like you, which is not that super common, but it is common enough that I have friends that are but like, it's it's a big deal. It's a cool deal. I'm always excited.

I'm surprised you even like can see a community like that in LA because la feels very white to me. But maybe it's just like the overall look of it. And I haven't been here that long, but it doesn't seem diverse in LA. Yeah, it is. Like,

it depends on like, where you are. Right. And I grew up in the valley. So

is that like North North Hollywood? cgit. Exactly.

So we had a little bit more diversity out here. That I think some neighborhoods but there was still only a few of us in like my grammar school that were mixed. And then yeah, you know, well, like some of them I wanted to be friends with and some I did. But they can't because I'm just thinking,

my neighborhood where I grew up on Long Island, New York, it was I guess Long Island's mostly like a Jewish Island and like pretty white. My town was like, Anglo Saxon white people, Christian families. So just like my hometown was very, like, homogenous, very white.

My like, I'll my grammar school was everybody was an actor, or pretty much if you weren't a kid actor, your parents were actors. So it was an interesting diversity because like Eric Estrada's kids went to our school, like, you know, like, we have, like, all these different then there's also like, a lot of a huge Jewish population, but also, a lot of white couples adopting different nationalities as well. Yeah,

I guess that's another la stereo, right.

But it's kind of true one and, and coming to like a performing heavy performing arts school. We did have like different nationalities coming in. So my school is very diverse. Not that many of us were mixed. I remember there was one girl in my class, I was mixed that they always sat me next to who was very interesting. And I was like, please stop sending me next time like thinking,

thinking you guys would get along or something. Or were they like,

yeah,

put putting the two together just because like, you look similar. I didn't complain

that much about she was like one of those people that like made booger animals and did like weird stuff and like, smelled fun. And I just wasn't really like, kind of a complainer. So I think they just sat me next to her. Because I can't claim or if I got or if I did complain, they were just gonna sit me outside anyway, cuz I was gonna talk too much. Just like, just put her next to her. Um, yeah, they were like,

We have to play Kate the bigger animal.

Maybe Anastasia could do it. Yeah. Actually, the two MCs girl that I went to school with. Were not they were both like, very strange to me. Like she was strange. And then there's this one other mixed girl in my class that I stabbed me with a pencil I still have the lead in my arm.

Oh my god. Do you really?

You can see it right there. But um, so Wednesday Yeah, it did. It's still in there. And then two mixed boys in my class. And yeah, I hung out with them more than I the girls obviously cuz stab.

Fair enough augers

stabbing boogers did that.

Did that like help you Figure out your identity eventually. Or like, what was your identity crisis journey? Like?

I mean, I think it's like so like, when I was really young, there wasn't a lot of, for me to look to,

like, yeah, like representation rise,

the only actress I knew that was biracial and light skinned, like me that was auditioning at the time was the girl that played six on blossom. And so every time I saw her on an audition or saw her around, I felt really empowered. Like, yeah, like, there was something like me. Like, that's you. Yeah, that's me. And, and she was so successful. blossom, your work? Yeah. And so setting you up for a future. Exactly. And other ones, either they didn't talk about it. Or, you know, a lot of it came, you know, people are like, oh, they're mixed later on, in their career or something like that.

Because they had to sort of keep it on the download to get work or not be pigeonholed, right? It's, it's, it's hard to,

you're gonna whatever you read whatever they seen you, you don't want to like, hurt their narrative, because you want to work, right? So you're like, whatever you see. Sure. Just cast me. And I think when I was a teenager, I kind of went back and forth. Like I went, like, really like Raiders jacket, baggy jeans, like Tupac CDs, and then like, Green Day. I just did not know what I was doing. I was like,

Yeah, I listened to a lot of Green Day. They they're great for the anxi right?

I'll talk rose came around and I was like, Damn, I'm gonna blast. freak out my mom. And I a pagan. Let

me get some eyeliner,

eyeliner, dark lipstick. And book from a new age is just great.

It's crazy. You see these, like, music videos, and these artists and you identify so strongly with them when you're like this vulnerable teenager and you're like, That is me. This must be my future. This is everything about me. And it's like, No, papa rich knows nothing about you. And this is so far off from what you'll become.

Yeah, like, absolutely. And I think, you know, I think I was really excited with the whole witchcraft thing. Because I think every like, angsty teen is but also seeing Rachel true. Be this, you know, beautiful biracial girl that like, you know, is like, in a movie being a wit badass, which I was like, Yeah, like, I'm gonna be a witch too. It's in my blood. biracial girls are all riches. Which we are. Yeah, that's empowering. We all have special powers. Don't mess with us.

Okay, I'm gonna write.

But yeah, so I feel like I, I like, was always trying to figure it out. And I also felt very pressured to choose. And also, there's a great extra pressure being light skinned, because I sometimes can pass, which is not an honor. Or, like, some people were like, like, that's not actually like a really nice statement. But thank you. So I had to, like, really do some soul work and go, Okay, what do I identify as, like, what do I feel?

And I feel proud of looking inward, right?

Like, what do I feel, and I feel proud of both sides of my, you know, racial identity. And I can be both, but I doesn't make me a woman of color. And I'm proud of that. And, like, I was never one that was like, let me straighten my hair and let me conform more. I was always just like, this is me, but I don't know what that means. And I have anxiety about it. But this is me. You know, and I think once I embraced it,

yeah, that's you're trying to be true to yourself the whole time. I was but you know, like, you're putting on the costume of each identity.

Yeah, I was like, I was like, I never, you know, like, I always had my curly big hair, you know, and people would make fun of me and, and, you know, put stuff in my hair and stuff. Like, that's what kids do. That's what kids do. I had all kinds of nicknames based on my hair, or all kinds of nicknames based on being biracial. And some of them I was like, really upset about, I would tell people, but I think in my, yeah, I think in my 30s, I really was like, I just don't care about the other narratives, because I just want to be the proud person of color I am and the people that have the other narratives on both sides that are negative towards biracial. women, men, babies, whatever. It's not really my problem. It's just a it's just like another form of bigotry that they're just not quite ready to express and, you know? Yeah, I mean, it is bigotry.

Did you feel that? from your family? Did you feel like your family pressure either way,

I feel that there are statements that they don't realize, hurt biracial people. Like I think I think people think that they can say a lot of stuff to biracial people, and it's like in jest, but it's like, it's not, it's not something you would say about anybody else's racial identity. So why would you

even saying you can pass for white like, that might be something that comes to your mind as like, you could say this with no filter, like, maybe think about it first. Is that a compliment? Is it salting?

Right? And what what? What exactly does that mean? So I can pass so you think I can pass this? Wait, what benefit? Why me? And also what danger does that put me in? I mean, I talked about it in my one woman show about the time I unintentionally passed, and it put me in a very dangerous situation. And I don't know why anybody would wish that upon me. So you, you know, like, I like I don't understand what you're saying. Basically, by saying, you can pass so you can lie about your identity. Yeah. And past? What? Yeah, like to do what? So it matters to these people that I'm half black. And so I should hide that. And do what be friends with that? No,

not at all. Or like, you're going incognito and whatever, like some special club.

I mean, like, maybe if I can use it as a spy, then yes. Like, maybe I can be fit amps up the witchcraft power,

right? Maybe, but I don't really see a benefit. Right, like,

you know, but that's Yeah, people thinking without a filter, who, hopefully they're not thinking when they say that, but who knows? People don't understand sometimes.

Yeah, they don't i don't think they understood. I think they are. I, my mom is very good about this kind of stuff. Because she's been hearing it since the 60s. Right. Like about her responses. She's very quick to respond and very, like, Great about responses. I am a little bit more comedic. But it's like, we said if they're asking question. Yeah, like, if they're asking questions. And if they're like, curious, then answer and like, you know, and make them a friend or make them acknowledge, you know, no, no, something, maybe you can change their mind, you know, and yeah, sometimes I feel that way. And then sometimes I feel like it's not my responsibility, but that's fair.

I sometimes people say like, Hey, you know, nice shirt. And I'm like, Don't talk to me, like I don't to talk to talk to strangers, a lot of like, pressure on people. So to explain your racial identity is like asking so much. Yeah, random person on the street.

Oh, and you get and I get it all the time, people will come up to me, and they'll be like, What are you? You're so exotic looking? What are you blah, blah, blah. And it's, yeah, like, it's exhausting. And sometimes you want to just be like, I'm human. And, or, yeah, be like, I'm a ghost, who,

you know, just don't want to have the same conversation over and over and like, answer these questions, right? This is not a lecture. Like you're not teaching a class.

But that is something that they, you know, like, even told my parents when they got married, like, get married, but don't have kids. And don't bring him into this because there's going to be

don't bring him into this.

Yeah, don't bring it because there's a lot of people that aren't, quote unquote, racist that will not understand the blend, you know, not be understanding what the blending of it. And so it's, it's interesting, but I do feel like a slight responsibility to answer, I think, because like, when you're mixed, when you're biracial, you're like a bridge, and people are gonna walk on over you, but at least they're getting to the other side. It's like, like this thing, and it must like It's so tiring all the time. It does. And I mean, like, it gets tiring, too. I mean, like, with all the stuff that was going on, during COVID, when people were finally really focused on social justice, and it's not new to them, and it's not new to people woke up. Yeah. And it was like people had time to watch the news. I would say that's

hopefully what it was.

For me. And I, when social justice became a hashtag that was really like

when it came around crowded brands. Instagram blew up for the right reasons. Then we have a million social justice warriors now. So it's for the better.

Even some of my friends that are biracial, you know, that hadn't quite come to their identity, I felt like we're almost forced into their identity because of the questions that they were asked. And then it's just like,

that's how Yeah, I feel like a lot of these identities we have to uphold. It's because you have to pigeonhole yourself. So people understand and so we're all uncomfortable. Because that's just how people work. We want to understand we want to label people so that our brains are like, Okay, I get it. biracial, new thing that's happening, like, move on to the next person to label.

Yeah, and I think that a lot of, you know, VIP OCS are feeling an exhaustion from like, from this whole, like, season of social justice, which is great. Yeah. Like, it's like, I felt like, great. You guys are here. That's amazing. You're here. But when you were rolling your eyes at me just a year ago for saying the same thing? Why was up to listen to, you know, and that was one of the big things I talked about in therapy. I was like, I'm trying to be very happy that everyone's here. But I'm also remembering the moments I cried in my car, when they said something stupid to me.

You're like, Oh, God. Like, the journey for them to get there was exhausting and tiring for you. And for so many other people.

I'm like, I am exhausted. And I want to tell everyone to like just fall off. But like, also that doesn't further anything.

Yeah, I guess you can shut your your own Instagram off or whatever. You could stop watching it for a minute. But then it's always around you.

It is I mean, like, I guess I'm really not good at like that. Like, let me take my time off of social media. I think he knows it's a great marketing tool. And I am. Dawn, I must get on there. And

yeah, I love following you on Instagram. You're always like posting great stuff.

Oh, thank you. Thank you. Yeah, but like, I feel like I can't. I mean, obviously, I can stop. I can. Um, but I just don't feel like

I have to admit you have a problem. Turn it off.

But I also just like I it's, it's our connection to the world right now. And I find it hard and something. So I want to turn it into a positive, I don't want to just like dive into the negative. And I feel like deprivation. And maybe this is just coming from the fact that I had an eating disorder for so many years. And this is kind of one of the things in recovery that you realize, deprivation just makes you want something more and miss you that

you know, I shouldn't be cutting it out.

Right? It's just trying to find a healthy balance and putting up boundaries. Yeah, stuff like that, like finding those. So I feel like every time I deprive myself of something, like go, I'm not gonna touch social media today. All I'm thinking about social media. All I'm thinking about, you know, like going gung ho for the next week.

So yeah, that's like what they say about, about crate cravings to where it's like, if you really crave donut, go eat the doughnut, otherwise, you're going to drive yourself crazy. You're gonna eat a bunch of other shit. And yeah, no, you should have just had the doughnut.

Yeah, I mean, it's, it's something that they really, they talk about, I think more than like, eating disorder recovery than they do and anything else, but I think it applies to everything in our life. Right? Like, yeah, and that's,

I'm glad you're saying that too. Because also, I was like, thinking with the new year, everyone goes on these crazy fad diets or like has weight loss resolutions that usually are overreaching. They're not gonna happen right away. You want them to see you. You want to set realistic goals. You don't want to starve yourself. You want to be like, I need food. I need to eat to live and nourish my body because these like Instagram posts that promote you know, some kind of perfect image that's not realistic and to deprive yourself of food to deprive yourself of Instagram, it's gonna like you said, Make you want it more. So don't get yourself out of anything.

No, don't. Don't say no. Like, don't say no, say no. But like don't cut something out and just say no, say yes. Say No. Say I think it is like this, like negative labeling of things is when when it really becomes hard to like, resist them. Like

a lot of people have these. These ultimate sayings really like Twitter is bad. Instagram is toxic. And it's like, yeah, it's all terrible. But if you use it a little bit, if you're talking to people through it, if you're promoting your business, there's good things in it. Yeah, I

try to focus on the positive of it. I mean, like everybody gets negative and one of the things that like was really hard for me on Social media was like those diet teas and those diet

What are they called detox teas? Shake your brains out.

Exactly. Or I don't know.

Yeah, new diet new this know that. And so, look, he's taking this pill, we should all be taking it. Easy, crazy advertisements.

So I started just just tagging that like flagging them and going I don't want to see this. I don't want to see this on Facebook. I don't wanna see this on Instagram. I don't want to see this on Twitter.

Yeah, I can't believe I'm even getting them like that. They're out there like that.

Yeah, they are. I mean, people are trying to take them down, like, organizations like I weigh, which is a great organization, if you're heading

was gonna recommend, yep, recommend that I weigh as it's very body positive. It's very, like, fact based. Yeah.

Yeah. And, and also, like, I think I started this year going, trying to do a better positive narrative in my head, where like, if I reach for a cookie, it's like, that's not a bad food. And I try to like impart into my family, because we've all had like negative food.

It always starts from the family.

There's a little there's a negative food narrative in our family, and I think yes, of my recovery. I've forced my family to really make some interesting changes. And I'm super proud of them, like, especially my mom coming from like a southern background, saying this little under things that southerners say, I sent her now like, even I was about to slip kind of, in the new year. I was like, well, maybe I'll just go back on Weight Watchers, and I'll do this. My mom was like, No, no, don't do it. Just eat as healthy as you can make better choices. You know what you're doing? You know what's healthy. And I was like, you're right. And not that Weight Watchers is a bad thing. Because for somebody Yeah.

It might some people really gained stuff from it.

Yeah. And that's fine. But knowing myself knowing that I going on that program will go crazy.

I mean, I know it's it's more like a point peace system. So if you get really caught up with like, numbers, competition, it might not be the best solution,

right? Knowing knowing yourself and knowing your goals and knowing what makes you go a little bit off. Counting and just makes me think nothing but about food, and I just go negative all over the place. You know, I go

Yeah. And so it's no way to live. No, and you're like, someone who's counting calories, or I mean, you know, I do know, people who've used Weight Watchers, and that's different. If you're using it in a healthy way, but if you're like counting calories, or like being super neurotic about your food intake, it's just gonna drive you insane. Yeah, and it's not sustainable. It's just gonna keep eating away at you like mentally so yeah, just, like, longevity wise, you can do over the long term, like, yeah, and there's so well balanced meals, exercising

Exactly. Things. I've just been focusing on goals like, like my goal in life and like my little actions of joy. So like, I i've been like focusing on like, Let's just eat a vegetable today. Let's just yeah, let's have a yogurt. Like our goal today is to have a vegetable and a yogurt and maybe go for a walk. That doesn't feel overwhelming to me. It doesn't mean like I have to count how much I ate. Like, it's just like, yeah, I went in there and got a yogurt and I ate a vegetable. I'm proud of me.

Hey, you got you got some in green. You got a stepson? Yeah, that's awesome. I've been trying to integrate more walks because I feel like I did that in early quarantine fell off. Now. I'm like, let me walk again. Yes, these legs.

Exactly. Just Just like I got one of those planners with like little habits. And I'm trying to get crazy with it. But like, my, my goals are so much different than like, you looked at my Passion Planner from last year, for instance, this year. It's literally like wake up. Yeah, okay.

If that's what the pandemic has done to us, made us want to meditate more. Thank you pandemic. Like I think that's better. Just write writing down my goals writing down like a little posted of, hey, I want to accomplish three things today. It really helps me so I think everyone should write down what you want to accomplish.

That's why I like those little planners that have like the little habits a day and so then I can cross them out and there's so much amazing feeling that I feel when I cross it out. I just get so excited. And I know that I know but I love it.

I have gotten wait to into post it's during this pandemics. I got a new job that like bought me postage and I'm like, Okay, I'm gonna use him for the job for life. Everything's gonna be on a post it and it helps me. create these little lists, cross them off. recycled paper and less circular thing I can really get into.

I love at office supply. So I'm for it.

It's such an easy thing. Everyone should write goals on post sets we can accomplish world peace. If we all do

it really good. I'll put world peace online today and we'll see if Okay,

I'll put social justice.

Hashtag justice. Yes.

Make the hashtag grow.

So,

okay,

we talked about biracial identity crisis. Tell us about why you made the one woman show. How was the inspiration behind that?

Well, the inspiration, I always felt like I wanted to do a one woman show because like, it felt like as a comedian, like the thing to do.

It's definitely Yeah, how to get your name out there. Like you said, making your own content.

Yeah, making my own content. I didn't think that it would be as hard hitting for people as it is. I, I it touches on some deep stuff. And

so for the audience, it was hard hitting.

Yeah, I think I think like, even like, My my, my sisters are like people that they're like, it was really good. But oh my god.

Yeah, I feel like family always gets the hardest, where they're like, wait, why it like, yeah, lies what's going on in your head?

Yeah, and it's really about me, from like, 10, under. So even though there's these big, pig, dramatic things that happened to me, it all happened when I was under 10. So I think that was hard for people to really, I was like, Wait till we get to teens, man, we're only I'm only telling them this way. You know? Um, yeah. So I think

maybe in the next incarnation, inquiry, nation of film or whatever you can make yourself older.

Exactly, exactly. And so I was just inspired to kind of like, I was writing this pilot about my family. And I was, I was struggling to, like, get it like, the way I wanted it to. And then I had this opportunity to do a storytelling show about like, year and a half ago, two years ago. And it like, I did it completely off the cuff. Like, I just knew the subject I didn't, I hadn't done a lot of storytelling shows, I hadn't even like planned out what I was going to say. And I did it. And I got a good response. And I really liked doing it. And I was like, Well, what if I did it in like an hour format, took this one story and expanded upon other stories, and then did little woke lessons in between talking about, you know, feelings and what it's okay to say and when it's okay to do. And so it just kind of came from there. And I got the opportunity to do it during a pandemic. They asked me to do it again, for solo in March, virtually. So it'll be out again, and nice. It actually changed my pilot so much that it's like, locked in, and I'm ready to like shop it around. And I feel very accomplished by that. That's cool. Yeah, like, I feel really good about that. It is one of those things that I can't help that some people might feel guilty about listening to,

like the repercussions of what other people feel about it.

Yeah, I mean, I think I think it's, it's funny, and it's entertaining. But there are some harsh truths in there that maybe sometimes you don't want to. or you didn't think you felt that way or said things that were like, in that vein, and then you hear it and you're like, Oh, wait, I say things like that, or I do things like that. And I feel like we all have stuff like that. Right? Like,

yeah, I mean, it's just more prevalent from an artist point of view, because you're making it into art you're making into like a longer story for the stage. And then of course, family will have like feedback, but if you explain Hey, it's my perspective. Yeah, my story. I'm not, you know, this is not criticism.

Oh, yeah. I mean,

yeah, I felt like they all like really got none of them were they just were like, wow, like, there's like, I can't believe you said it out loud. Like, and I was like, well, they're like, that's brave. Like, I would never say it and I was like, Well, I I feel like it's time to like, not close our mouths and actually say stuff. Instead of just like taking it in. Every time somebody says something like that to you and you and you are internalizing that and it hurts and it just like starts hurting your, your whole being every time you get one of those little things I'm like, I'd rather just say, don't say that to me.

I got to the point of otherwise or like don't say growing this, this this cyst in your body where you're like, this is really like digging into my bones. Now when you say it makes it lighter puts it out there. Yeah. And I try to make it in a fun way.

And, you know, I try to make it easier to to communicate or. But I think also people are very receptive right now. They want to hear they want to learn, they want to know. And as better as it is that it's now my 37th year that people want to listen, I'm ready to tell.

I don't I have to see it. So let let's know. Tell us how to find it when it comes out again.

Oh, yeah, it's at the white fire theatre. It will be streamed on March 24. You will, if you buy a ticket, you get it for the you get the link for 48 hours. So you can watch it whenever. And I think it'll be on demand before then, too. I just don't know. It'll all be through whitefire Theater. But yeah, it's called 50 shades of mixed confessions of your ethnically ambiguous best friend.

So nice. I like the title. So do you

like like little kids going to neo nazi birthday party, so you should watch it?

I think we could all learn a lot. Yeah, it seems like it might have like the hard truths of like, something like ninette with Hannah Gatsby being like, this is like some shit that happened to me. Let me tell you about it. And then people are like, Whoa, so um, yeah,

I think that's a good way to describe it. Because I think a lot of people because I'm very light and like, comedic a lot of time we're Yeah,

you're very like, Whoa, bubbly. Yeah.

They weren't quite prepared for like some serious stuff to go down. But it does. There's some serious stuff in it.

You're showing us your range.

Right. I'm also you know, just telling telling stuff that happened to me. And so yeah, I think that's a great like, those are great. Those are great stories to like, say like that, but they're kind of like that. Yeah, yeah.

I'm just thinking like, cuz people love Nanette I still have to watch her newer one. Douglas. I haven't watched that one yet. Because I've heard that's much different. But people love the honesty of Nanette so I think more comedians should be honest, should be mixing in seriousness with their comedy because we're good performers and storytellers. And you know, we should tell all the stories.

Exactly like fleabag. If you ever seen the actual like, Yeah, one woman show before it became Whoa, that's intense. Man. So I wasn't that I went, like, I think people were like, Oh, it's gonna be jokey, jokey. I was like, yeah, there's lots of jokes in there. But it also there's like, some serious stuff. And I think I just tried to tell people that now.

Like, maybe trigger warning, or like, maybe you don't want us to deal with them after you're like, just so you know, there's dramatic heavy stuff.

I got a lot of people sending me cake and flowers after so it was very sweet, man. They really listened to it.

That's a huge win.

Yeah, I was like, I'm gonna get cake for everything now. Because there's this whole thing where I'm denied cake. And it's very dramatic. So it's very interesting. Oh, no.

I I get it. Definitely check it out in March.

Yes, March. Um,

tell us what, what do you do when you're like creative and you hit a roadblock? Or like a writer's block kind of thing? How do you get out of the rut?

Usually, it depends on what kind of rut It is like. So I've kind of hit one in a feature film that I've been writing. I like, there's something that's just like, I can't get past it. And I don't know how to finish it. So I've ditched it. Put it away for now. And you did working on some other stuff.

He did a feature.

Well, like I wrote this feature, and it's like, I can't finish it. There's something like, I am not ready to finish it. I guess. I don't know. There's something that's just like not meshing. And no matter how much I stuff things in or redo it, I get very frustrated. And yeah, I feel like I'm just hitting a wall. And I put

it on the shelf, kind of,

as I'm putting on the shelf until I feel like I have something else to add to it. Because I feel like if I keep bumping my head, I'm going to get so frustrated. I'm not going to want to write anything. And so, I've just been like, you know, seeing these other projects that I've been really, like, you know, excited about or have put on the list on my phone, like, I tried to write that out, you know, or, you know, just write those like mind meld stuff that brain flow thing. Just see what pops out. I, I don't have too many problems with like not having other creative projects to do, because I'm like always coming up with like weird ideas. What I do have problems sometimes is finishing things when I get to the frustration, so I have to like, go, we need a break from each other, we need a break in this relationship for a little bit.

Yeah, like you want to be able to recognize when you're stuck somewhere, put it down, but come back to it, like coming back to it as the key. A lot of people forget about,

right coming back to it. And there's no shame. Like, I feel like what I had to remove was the shame of having to put it down like I must finish this in one setting. No, you don't. You don't, you know, like, there's some some projects that are gonna be like 10 year projects, and there's one, there's some projects gonna be a month. And that's okay. Like, you know, and they might, it might just be something that you're not ready to complete yet.

And I mean, so many, so many great films and works of art, they take forever, like going back and forth between them, like get out or queens Gambit took, you know, years and years and years.

And I think, I think it's probably a sign especially since like, I'm one of those writers that puts a lot of myself and my experiences in it. And so there's obviously something I'm not ready to deal with in this thing, or haven't made a decision about, you know, and so, you know, therapy will figure out what that decision is supposed to be.

Right? You want to hopefully deal with it in your minds in your life before you deal with it on the page, like early before you make it public.

Yeah, like, I have to hear like questions like, why did you come up with that? Like, that's the thing. When you're writing about race as much as I do, I write a lot about race and feelings and social justice, in comedy, and also in horror and stuff like that. And like messing with those concepts and making them comedic and horrible at the same time. Like, I have to make a decision about what kind of statement that I'm ready to make with those. And I think sometimes that's what stops me. And I have to go, what am I ready to say? What am I ready? What

am I trying to tell the world? Yeah,

yeah, what am I trying to tell the world? Am I ready to tell that to the world yet? or How can I tell it to the world where I'm comfortable? saying?

So we're taking a moment to reflect on it and be like, is this what I'm trying to say? Before you just like vomit onto the page?

Right, or vomit it out? And then go, No, I'm not ready to say that.

Yeah.

My drawer. That's we're not gonna say that.

Let me think about everyone who's gonna see this.

We want to say that we will not say that right now. Maybe we'll make

it more digestible for the common people.

Right? All at once that person's an alien, and it's a lot more easy to digest it.

The trick of storytelling is you can really meld everything as you want it to be.

Yes.

How's how's standup going? Are you doing stand up at all?

I am, I'm doing a lot of zooms.

Really, I'm for all these projects.

I you know, I don't sleep. But I have never been a good sleeper. But like zoom shows, it's, I feel like it's so much easier for me to get things done now that I don't have to leave. To go to do anything. Yeah, I have to leave the house to do anything. And I don't have like to drive everywhere in LA. Like, I feel like yeah, I can do a particular way to get done. And then do another podcast and then roll over. You know,

I've only done one stand up show the whole pandemic but it was so easy and so great. Because I could prepare in my house and then just like sit in front of my laptop, like it was so simple, I

thought, right? It's all fine. And like, I

just do this all the time. Like no more driving, let's driving.

just cancel driving, let's sit here I have my lighting, I have my whatever. And then I usually have like my whole, like, I have this whole Google Drive of jokes that I kind of rotate through. And then based on what I'm hearing on the other, you know, comedians, the sad things around, and then I go, Okay, this crowd will like that, or like,

it's so awesome.

And that's awesome. You just have it up, do it on your laptop in front of you. You're not like, mentally let me access my Google Drive and go through this in the greenroom.

Or if some comedian says something like and I'm like, Oh, God, I kinda have a joke that that kind of bounces off that one, like, and then I like, you know, read down.

That's good. I like it. I like the fact that we can perform to so many different areas of The country now. And then the world rooms are much bigger because you can access like infinite seats.

Yeah,

that's really cool. Yes, you're talking up comedy a minute, do some more because you're, you're speaking so highly of it.

I like it. You know, I think when I, when I first started out I, in the pandemic, I tried a couple zoom ones. And it was weird because some people didn't mute. And some people do like and you just use it. They're both bad for different reasons. And you just kind of get used to, like, you want people you want some laughs But you don't want disruption. Right. And you will get disruption. Somebody answered a phone call during one of our shows. It was very interesting. No, but so, you know, if you can't hear anybody laughing then it's more like a monologue. You just have to adjust things. It's just an adjustment. It's an adjustment. I had to stand up and get my wheel. I will fix that. And post of it looks weird.

No, no, that's cool. We're coming to the end. So on Therapy Roulette, we spin the wheel and you land on a random word, and then you just riff on that word for a minute or two. Like, how's the area of your life going?

Okay.

That was a really good spin proud of myself. No, it landed on a childhood memory. So you could tell us anything you remember from childhood? Something you miss something you don't miss.

Well, the funny thing is that I have been looking through some of my childhood stuff, and I found my papale Do you know the puppet

Sounds familiar?

I don't know. It was like a doll that like what like fold up into a ball and fold it and had like little tiny baby dolls in it. Okay, big stuffed animal thing

like a Russian doll. Not but stuffed.

Yeah, but like a stuffed animal roll up. So I found that like, yesterday and I was really happy when I found all these other childhood memories. Like I found all the teddy rub skin books and tapes. But I haven't found my teddy rub skin. So I'm just hoping Teddy if you're listening.

We're going through like a box of stuff. How'd you come across all of it?

Well, one of my dreams is coming true which is outside of my house. There's this ugly, ugly shed and huge palm trees that I hate with passion. And as a Christmas gift to me. I miss getting it removed. Oh wow. You're out the shed to clear the shed. And it's it's just it's so beautiful that I will not have to see that stupid palm tree. I actually found a picture of my dad planting the palm tree when I was a kid. I lived with my child.

And I cursed I thought like I hate that he planted that stupid palm tree and now it'll be gone. Why do you hate a tree with such fervor? Like what is it about the tree that drives you? So

up the wall? Well, it's like always putting this big palm on the house. And then I can't get them like like climb on the roof. Yeah, the big hole palm leaves. And I don't know I saw this like thing where they say rats and possums live in them. And I'm like, I don't want no.

Say no more. I

thought it was like obstructing the sun or something.

No, I have blackout curtains for a reason. Yeah,

just causing you to do chores and creatures are living there. I get it.

I just wanted gone and I'm just like, I like almost cried when my mom told me that she's like, Merry Christmas.

She knows you.

She she does. She does the greatest thing you could ever do.

That's funny. Merry Christmas, Anastasia. Happy New Year,

girl. Night.

We're at the end. Tell us where to find you. Tell us again how to find the show and where to follow you.

Sure, you can find me at Anastasia W on twitter at Anastasia Wash on Instagram, and Anastasia TV on YouTube. And you can find the show at whitefire theatre.com. Solo fest it will be called 50 Shades of Mixed confessions of your ethnically ambiguous best friend. And that's me.

Very nice. Definitely check it out. And it was so nice talking to you.

Really nice talking to you.

We'll talk again soon. This has been Therapy Roulette: consent to vent. If you liked this episode, be sure to subscribe. leave a review if you can and tell your friends. I'll be back with a new episode next Thursday.

Therapy Roulette: Consent to Vent / Trauma disguised as comedy / Therapy Roulette: Consent to Vent / If you don’t have problems, then you’re likely repressing sh*t and you should find a therapist / (Who’s not me)