Therapy Roulette

The Magic of Talk Therapy and Bombing on Stage w/ Sophie Spiers

August 19, 2021 Michele Baci / Sophie Spiers Season 1 Episode 135
Therapy Roulette
The Magic of Talk Therapy and Bombing on Stage w/ Sophie Spiers
Show Notes Transcript

Michele (@michelebaci) catches up with writer, comedian and actor Sophie Spiers (@sophiespierscomedy). Sophie tells us how she first started therapy when she moved to Los Angeles, opens up about her experience with panic attacks, the wonders of medication, talk therapy, and learning how her body reacts to anxiety. She explains her motivation for doing standup, why she’s totally fine with bombing on stage, creating outrageous characters, and filming funny videos for YouTube and social media. Michele and Sophie discuss how to find a therapist and get started with therapy, documentary “experts,” and why TikTok doesn’t work for millennials.
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Theme Song:

Therapy Roulette Consent to Vent / Trauma disguised as comedy / Therapy Roulette: Consent to Vent / If you dont have problems, then youre likely repressing sh*t and you should find a therapist/ (Whos not me)

Michele Baci:

Hey, you crazy people. What's happening? You're not crazy. I promise we're all totally. Okay. Just the way we are. Welcome back to Therapy Roulette consensus that my name is Michele Baci, and we're back with another episode. This week is a fun interview with Sophie Spiers. She is a comedian, a writer, and an actress based in Los Angeles, I actually met Sophie, when I first moved out here almost four years ago, which is wild to think about, she was one of the first people I've met. And I know she was pursuing a writing career at the time. And I think she's since like, branched out into different areas of entertainment. Similar to what I have done so many people I know out here in LA, I've done talking to her was really nice, because she reminded me that comedy is real. And you can go out there and pursue comedy, you can have fun, you can make up characters, she is really entertaining to watch on social media, and I know she has a YouTube channel. So when we had our interview, I was like, Oh, my God, Sophie's really like going after it, she's doing the thing I want to do. So he reminded me that I got to get back out there and do more comedy I haven't been doing stand up, I haven't been really like leaving my house. So it's nice that other people are and I give her major props. I would love to go back and do stand up. This this month is August. And I had a goal for myself to get out and get back on stage in August. But I don't know if I'm going to reach that goal, I might have to push it a little further. I am traveling back to New York to see family, I have a engagement party to attend for my sister. And I was hoping I could hit up a few mics or shows while I was in New York. But now the Delta variant is raging a little bit. I don't really know if it's the best thing for me to do while I'm visiting my family. So we'll see. But I really do miss comedy. Also on a COVID note, go get the vaccine if you're not vaccinated, now is the best time to get the vaccine. I wasn't going to make a statement about it. But I think it's important to at least research it look into it. You know, it makes sense for most people, I think if you're not at risk, like immunocompromised or you have other health factors that could impact a negative reaction. If you're healthy, the vaccine makes a lot of sense. And it can protect the rest of us. So please, research it and don't just listen to people on the internet who are just you know, posting memes. Yeah, I'm about to hop on a flight to New York. So I think I'll make this intro short and sweet. I want to encourage you to do what you love. chase your dreams. And if you're like me, and you've become a total hermit, in the past, whatever we're in now, a year and a half, like I leave my house only to do errands and it's crazy. So if you become a hermit like me, don't give up on your dreams. You owe it to yourself to go chase them. If you like this podcast, leave us a review. It only takes like five seconds to do write me five stars. Any number of stars, write a few words. Boom, send that review. that'll really help the podcast to grow. Thank you so much. And here's the interview.

Theme Song:

guest interview / a friend for you / strangers whose issues are relatable / guest interview / They're the voice that's new / this person has problems and they don't mind discussing it, but they still need a therapist / (Whos not me)

Michele Baci:

Okay, so welcome back to another episode of Therapy Roulette. I'm Michele Baci, and we're here with Sophie spires. She is a comedian, a writer and actress. I think that's the hierarchy of things she is. She is based in Los Angeles, as am I and she hosts a weekly open mic at the comedy nook, which I asked to go check out of a meeting to Sophie, welcome to the podcast.

Sophie Spiers:

Thank you for having me.

Michele Baci:

Of course. It's a pleasure. I always like a girl named Sophie. It's a good name for you.

Sophie Spiers:

You know, I found that it's the name of a lot of dogs. Um, it was. It was it's Oprah Winfrey's dog's name. So

Michele Baci:

Oh,

Sophie Spiers:

You know.

Michele Baci:

A successful dog

Sophie Spiers:

a successful dog. Exactly. I don't care that I'm a dog as long as I have money.

Michele Baci:

I mean, that that works for me.

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah, why not?

Michele Baci:

Truly I have a thing about dogs with people names. It's such a trend now. It is.

Sophie Spiers:

I know. I'm like, I want to meet a dog named Rupert, or like some kind of very traditional name like that. I feel like that's a dog I can respect.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, a royal dog. Exactly. That's funny. I feel like it's just a mark that we cannot connect to other humans anymore. We have to transfer it to the dog. Exactly. Right bird and Sophie come over.

Sophie Spiers:

I know. And who can blame us? Honestly, there are a lot of humans that I don't want to connect to. I might as well have a dog with a human name.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, I feel like it's common problem. I don't have a dog. But if I did, I probably name it, Rupert. Yeah, I would just pick a name not in circulation. So you don't get offended like you probably do.

Sophie Spiers:

I know. I did hear when I was on vacation, I heard somebody like Sophie, Sophie, and it was for the dog. And that was confusing.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, like, what do you do you go up to that person and correct them or let it be? Let it be. I know, as long as

Sophie Spiers:

people don't accidentally call me, Sophia, and I don't care whose name is Sophie. But that's my bigger pet peeve.

Michele Baci:

It's a much different vibe.

Sophie Spiers:

And people are always like, is Sophie short for Sophia? And I'm like, well, they have the same number of letters. So no. Not like, no offense to Sofia's with Sophia is I feel like have poodles and like parents that are artists, and I feel like Sophie's or I don't know, right? Anywhere from like, Royal to practical businesswoman. We can be anything.

Michele Baci:

I think you got to be more down to earth without that fancy A at the end. Yeah, exactly. So let's talk about therapy. Are you in therapy? If not, why not?

Sophie Spiers:

I am the poster child for therapy. And I am so glad you're having me on this podcast because I will talk about therapy all day

Michele Baci:

long. Please do because I just I think I started it just to like, dig into information and be like, what can I learn? Like, I want to be back in psychology classes.

Sophie Spiers:

Yes. I never took psychology classes because like, my brain was a textbook in and of itself. But I started therapy. God, I guess it was like three years now. So probably a year after moving to LA. And I have been seeing the same therapist for the whole time. And we like recently just went all remote and we meet once a week. And you know, it's love at first sight, love at first sight. I take my little meds I have my little meeting with her once a week. It's amazing. She gets me her name is Katie. And it's funny. Like I know nothing about her life. And she knows every painful detail. Yeah. And that's the kind of relationship you can only pay for.

Michele Baci:

It's a professional one. That's true. Do you ever think about Katie's and things like the she get overwhelmed knowing everything about you?

Sophie Spiers:

Um, sometimes I think well sometimes, like, on the zoom, I'm like, I'm so hyper aware of what she's doing. So if I see her look down, or like, look in a different direction, I never say this. But I'm like, is she looking at a text? Like, is she not paying attention to me? Because what I'm saying is so important. Um, and so I wonder if someday she just can't fucking deal with anything. I'm sure we're all human.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, like, does she have a notepad or something that she goes to write out?

Sophie Spiers:

She's never used a notepad. And she just because I went to a therapist when I first got here, who wrote out everything about me on a notepad and I was like, Oh, this is great, you know, writer to writer, I appreciate that. But Katie, she remembers everything. And sometimes she'll get details slightly off, but like, I'll just correct her and the essence of what she knows is correct. And it's really impressive. Like, I don't know how many clients she has, but I feel very special.

Michele Baci:

It sounds like she's really present.

Sophie Spiers:

She is she's present. Um, and she's funny. Yeah, go ahead.

Michele Baci:

It's funny you started three years ago, because we I think we moved to LA around the same time. Because I think I'm hitting year four in October. Me too. And I wanted to do therapy so bad when I got here because I just felt so like alone. And so in a new environment, and also it was like trendy, cool to do therapy. I think la was a big impetus for me to be like, go get help.

Sophie Spiers:

I know, I, like I always my family knows this. You know, I don't blame them for anything. But I think we didn't really come from a therapy household. And so I would like in high school. I now look back and see that I was having panic attacks, but at the time, I just considered the mental breakdowns. And my mom was like, you know, she's quirky, she's emotional. She's very intense. And I'm like, yeah, you know, it's normal, I guess to lock yourself in your room for a weekend like crying, having a panic attack about a chorus concert. Like it's not, yeah, does it have to be that serious, but I didn't, we didn't have therapy as an option just because it seemed more like a punishment than a thing that we actually, you know, wanted to embrace. I think it was also like a different time. And I think as many people were talking openly about, like mental health and all that stuff.

Michele Baci:

The young generation has the better end of it. Yeah, for sure.

Sophie Spiers:

So then when I moved to LA, I was like, having I remember I went into a Trader Joe's and I was trying to decide what to get for dinner, and I was on the phone with my mom, as if like she was there and could help me decide. And I just started, like, I couldn't breathe. And I was having a panic attack. And I went into my car, and I was like, you just had a panic attack attack. And an LA Trader Joe's, like, the next logical step is to go to therapy, because you've become to LA, you know, yeah, this is the word. I started and the rest is history.

Michele Baci:

And that's so awesome. Like you said, you mentioned maybe two therapists, but otherwise, like, the one you have with the therapist, now, it's been like a pretty long relationship.

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah. And I can't and I mean, she used to see her in person. And I would like rush from work to get to Beverly Hills. And it was always a stressful thing. But I was like, I have to do this because my week doesn't feel complete without it. And she's actually moving. So it's going to be fully remote. But I've actually liked the remote therapy, because I really can make it work with my schedule. Like I don't have to forego other things, you know, or leave early or anything. So it's really convenient.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, I think it definitely helps you like, build your schedule a little bit more out and like you don't have to drive to Beverly Hills. It's a huge plus.

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah, totally. I know driving to Beverly Hills at six o'clock on a weekday is from like Burbank, or somewhere like that is not ideal.

Michele Baci:

Where they they make you pay for parking extra Beverly Hills,

Sophie Spiers:

nothing is free. And I was always like, like going down accidentally going down one way streets or like, you know, parking in the garage, because I was just too lazy to find a meter and paying 40 bucks and then going outside and seeing all these years. And I'm like, this is why, like the parking enough is a reason to go to therapy. Yeah.

Michele Baci:

For sure, like let me deal with the stress of living in Los Angeles by

Sophie Spiers:

right by the time I would get to the sessions. I'd be like sweaty and disheveled. And sitting in like on her nice suede couch. And I'm like, I'm so sorry. I look like a freaky athlete who just finished like a big tournament.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, her other clients like have chauffeurs dropping them off? Yeah, that's not me.

Sophie Spiers:

I mean, it's not cheap. But like, I don't know, I just kind of decided it was something I was never going to forego. So I'd rather eat beans than like miss my therapy. Do you pay out of pocket? Or do you use insurance? I pay out of pocket, which is when I first started with this particular practice, they took my parent's insurance and I was only 25 I guess. So. So on their insurance. And then the minute I got my own, it was like, Oh, the only insurance we take is what your parents had. And we don't take any other. Like, great, right? So then I had to go out of pocket. And she did like a sliding scale for me, which is nice. And it's it's so a lot but it's you know, again, it's like an investment that I'd rather make than other things.

Michele Baci:

It's worth it for you. Plus, you've already like invested in in her in the fire, right?

Sophie Spiers:

I cannot imagine starting fresh with someone new and telling them all my shit like that, to me. Sounds exhausting.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, that's the hard part of finding a new therapist. Like I was talking to someone a few months ago, and she was definitely an older lady. But she kept forgetting what I had told her in other sessions. And I was like, if you can't remember anything, like come on. Where where's this gonna go? How am I gonna get healed? If you can't remember what I did? How are you going to heal me? Fix me? How am I gonna become normal? Yeah. Isn't that the goal? Yeah. What? What was your big fix for the panic attacks? Like how did you approach that? I think

Sophie Spiers:

I think a couple things like obviously, medic, I'm a big proponent for medication if you need it like that, coupled with talk therapy, or cognitive behavioral therapy or any of that, I think is great. Obviously, everyone's different, but that felt for me, like, I was talking about a friend with this the other day, it was like when I started taking medication, I was like, Oh, is this how normal people feel? like is this how they go through a day feeling because this feels like I'm on cloud nine. And that definitely took some of the weight off of my anxiety and like OCD and things and then just through the talk therapy kind of talking about Okay, when you get in these like situations and you feel something coming on how Can you in your own brain and like body? How can you and your body try to like Calm down, calm yourself down? And I like my therapist, cuz she does a lot of like, okay, but how does that make you feel in your body? And so it makes you like come outside of your brain for a minute and be like, okay, when I make this statement, I feel this in my chest, or I feel this in my stomach. So I think that's helpful because it like refocuses you. And I also before I felt like my default was to just put in no thought to like what was happening, and to just start, like, crying and complaining and calling my mom, like all hours of the day. So now I tried to take a minute before I do that, and I don't have to do it as much anymore. I mean, hardly at all anymore. That's good.

Michele Baci:

I know. Like, I think I've definitely had a few panic attacks, like in my life. Yeah. And I feel like I would always like, shut myself in an actual room or behind the door and just deal with it behind a door. But like, I didn't, I didn't, I felt like, you know, overwhelmed in that moment, like, my brain was like, outside my body. And I was like, What do I do? So it's good to know, like, doing that body scan and being like, how do I actually feel? And why like really taking it, taking that step outside of yourself to be like, what's going on?

Sophie Spiers:

Right? And even when you're feeling good things to like we talked about, you know, if I tell her something good, that's happening. She'll say, okay, and where do you feel that good feeling? And it's like, Oh, you're right. Not everything has to come from my brain. It can be in my body, too. And that's a good reminder to my brain. Is my brain just like fuck with me all day long. So it's like, no, there are other things at play here besides you, you dumb bitch.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, your body's actually way more than your brain. Right? Left to remember. Yeah. What's like a really? What's a really like? Great thing about Katie like that? She does that you appreciate?

Sophie Spiers:

Oh, my gosh, um, that's a good question. I think I think I really like the way she reminds me that my, like, I am at the center of all of this. So like, whenever I'm saying, Oh, I didn't know what to do about this. And I asked these people for their advice. That's all fine and good. That's something I'm working on is like going into looking into myself first before asking people for advice. And she always reminds me, she's like, okay, so and so said this, so and so said that, but it sounds like you didn't, you weren't satisfied with what they said. So like, why did you feel the need to ask them? Because it sounds like you already know what you wanted to do. And so I really like how she always brings it back to me, which is like, maybe me, you know, but that is the point of therapy. Like, I tell people, like I was telling my mom the other day, because she was telling me, you know, if you go to therapy, is it? Is it? Do they give you Oh, did they say oh, this person should be doing this, that or this person should be doing this? And I said, No, they don't like to correct the people in your life. They tell you how to better deal with them. And your

Michele Baci:

mom is like fishing for for gossip.

Sophie Spiers:

Exactly. Right? And I'm like, no, we're not sitting there saying you're doing things wrong. I'm saying, you know, this is what I feel and Katie's reminding me to focus on how I feel and like, Yeah, what I know. And my gut reactions and all of that. And so she constantly brings it back to that which is helpful, because otherwise I'll get bogged down in like, what should I do? What should I have done all that stuff?

Michele Baci:

Right? I feel like people who might not people who haven't really done a lot of therapy or not at all, like they don't realize how on prescriptive It is like, yeah, the therapist is not there to tell you what to do at all, they're supposed to dig it out of you. So you come to the realization,

Sophie Spiers:

right? Which is so brilliant, because, you know, I'll leave a lot of sessions and I'll be like, Oh, well, Katie told me I should do this. Just because that's easier than explaining to someone. Katie told me to look within myself. And then I somehow decided I needed to do this. Because really what it Yeah, it's she's asking the right questions and making me think in a way that I have, you know, I've gotten better, but I still have trouble thinking on that way, thinking that way on my own, like I need. I think I need someone who I consider to be an expert to like, pull the questions out of me.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, and have that unbiased person to talk to just because like, you don't really get that anywhere else.

Sophie Spiers:

Right? at all, especially because like she knows, I know, she knows. He knows my family. And I come from a very loud, opinionated family. And because I'm someone who's constantly asking for advice, I get a lot of advice. And then I take that advice, and I'm like, I'm mad at everyone. Why would they tell me all of this? And it's like, well, Sophie, you you went into the lion's den asking for advice, and you came out with advice. And you know, if you didn't want it, you shouldn't have asked. So

Michele Baci:

yeah, if we circle back to the beginning. Hey, Sophie. Yeah, exactly. He started it right.

Sophie Spiers:

Basically therapy is her reminding me that I caused a lot of my own problems and then helping me fix.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, which is great. Because like otherwise you'd be such as zigzag all over the place like riding around with no head, on your brain on your shoulders. Exactly. Which is Sam? Does your life in LA help you like process mental health and feel more mentally sounds like doing acting, writing comedy?

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah, um, I would say, I think life in LA in general, like the lifestyle helps me process mental health because I think my mental health gets trickiest when I don't have enough stimulation and enough stuff that I'm doing and involved in. And so, you know, no shade to home and where I grew up, and I love love my home, my family. But going back to the suburbs, I know that one, two weeks fine. But a few weeks after that, I might start to feel like more anxious and more in my own head. And my lifestyle in LA is just a lot busier. And it's a lot more interactive. And it doesn't allow for time for me to like spend in my own head. Yeah,

Michele Baci:

yeah, that idle time.

Sophie Spiers:

Exactly. So that's a good thing. And then also, the comedy is great for mental health. Because I mean, I guess good and bad, but it's like, you know, you could get on stage and totally bomb, but I don't actually find that that affects my mental health. Because you know that I mean, sometimes you're like, Oh, I did shitty. I wish I had done well. But you also know, every time you do shitty, there's another time that you're going to be doing well. So like,

Michele Baci:

yeah, just like hopefully, that you've learned that the shitty does does not stay. Like roughly that's happens. But like, everything happens. So totally loads momentary.

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah. And there's always someone who's been shittier than you. So like, Oh, definitely remember that? Yeah.

Michele Baci:

There's a surplus of comics who have no business doing it?

Sophie Spiers:

Totally. I mean, that's what I remind myself about everything. Because I'm like, yeah, so many people out here trying to be the best. And you have to remind yourself what a large percentage are not even the anything. That's so mean. But like,

Michele Baci:

even I'd like I've seen a couple professional comedy shows recently. And like the the less famous people who are on stage with the famous people. I'm like, Who are these guys? They're like, jokesters. They have no net, they got nothing for them. And they're still like, opening for the big names. Yeah, I know, honestly, keep putting yourself out there and it will work out.

Sophie Spiers:

That's my attitude, too. And also, like, I, I never act like I mean, there may be times where I get anxious. And I think, Oh, I see. So and So doing this, should I be doing that? Like, that's a huge thing I struggle with, but I also, in my heart of hearts never think, oh, all these people are better than me. I mean, we're talking about an ego. Like, I think every comic has to have some kind of ego, like, do what we do. And so that's the whole magic of it. Exactly. That's right. And I'm like, I'm not going to look around and be like, Oh, I'm bowing down to all these people doing these things. It's like, No, you just have to do what you're doing. And that can be hard to remember. But

Michele Baci:

yeah, I think I and my better days, I have that feeling to where I'm like, Oh, no, I'm the best one here. Like none of these people deserve to be here too. Yeah. Which is, you know, when you say it out loud, it's terrible. But it's also what you need to survive in Hollywood.

Sophie Spiers:

Totally. Even if you don't actually believe it. You have to just say it until you do believe it. Because that's stealthier

Michele Baci:

by overanalyzing, the people around me I can find their flaws.

Sophie Spiers:

Exactly, exactly. And I don't think, you know, finding people's flaws. I think we can all support people while still knowing their flaws and making ourselves feel better. So

Michele Baci:

yeah, honestly, I just admired the work ethic. Like they showed up, they, they're practicing, they're doing mics, they're doing shows, like good for that I could, I could be doing the same.

Sophie Spiers:

Right? That's it. I mean, that's a huge thing. I there are people that I see that are doing a lot. And that's when I get equal parts stressed about, like, failing and everything and motivated to do more. So yeah, you know, I think if I didn't have that motivate, like if I didn't have that trigger, I might not be as motivated.

Michele Baci:

What do you do? Like, what's your daily routine? Do you do comedy writing daily? Or like, do you still have a day job?

Sophie Spiers:

I still have a day job. I'm a freelance writer right now. Oh, nice, which has been great. I mean, I was working for drunk history, pre pandemic, and that was amazing. And then you know, we got cancelled and so I was really like, what can I do during the day in this totally like, digital remote worlds that will still pay the bills and that because comedy wasn't an option. And so I call me also isn't an option for paying the bills right now.

Michele Baci:

But I Explaining the podcast today, I was like, it's kind of like what comedy used to be like, I don't know, like comedy is like still finding its way back into my life.

Sophie Spiers:

Right, right same and I started doing the freelance writing. And that's been great, because then in the afternoons or evenings, I can do open mics, shows, and whatever. I mean, I'm not doing one every night, but I do try to, like, I don't put too much pressure on myself to write new stuff every day. Because, I mean, a lot of writers, like you know, I think it just, you've either feel it or you don't. So if I really don't feel like it, nothing I produce is going to be great. So I might as well wait for a day when I do feel like it and write, you know, 10 new jokes and work on those, then, like, force myself to do something every day. But yeah, I do also get a lot of thoughts at night, and I'll write them down on my notes on my phone, and I'll wake up and there'll be like murder or murder. Like they don't make sense. Or sometimes they do, and they're great. So

Michele Baci:

yeah, that the Notes app is definitely it's a safe haven for all my crazy ideas.

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah, same. I mean, I look at that app, sometimes just for fun, because I've written like, mom who loves zebras, and you're like, what

Michele Baci:

does that mean? Like, maybe that's a part of me. Right? Exactly. coming out in the night. Yeah. That's funny. The Notes app, I think just gives me full anxiety now because it's like, way, there's way too many notes. Like it's it's way far god what it should be.

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah. Until, I mean, I've just, I started as like a place to have my actual form jokes. And now it's just a scribble pad and I am let you know, which is no surprise, I'm not really an organized person. So it just looks like me.

Michele Baci:

Yeah. Tell me about your YouTube channel. Because I I've seen like some of your content that you've been putting out in the past year. How do you how do you shoot content? Do you have like a regular schedule? Or is it just like, whatever you feel like it,

Sophie Spiers:

that's also just kind of whenever I feel like it, I get like, talking about what I feel in my body, I get like a feeling. And I'm like, Oh, this is funny. I feel like I want to explore this, do something with this. And I'll just go and shoot it and like, edit it together. And, you know, put it out there. And I didn't ever do that until pandemic hit. And I had free time. And I had never considered myself like someone who puts stuff up on Instagram. But I started because I was like, why not? And I love it. I mean, I've seen a lot of people really take off in the last year with videos and stuff. And it's so inspiring, because I'm like, you never know what is going to be the thing that people love. But, you know, I make myself laugh. So like that's, I think that's what matters.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, and it's a lot of like short videos, too, which is what people are really digesting like the most

Sophie Spiers:

right? I started out with some I was like, Oh, I can't cut this. I can't cut this and I'd have these like minute and a half videos. And I go back now and I'm like, oh, no one wants to watch a video that long. That's like, it's like a sermon. So I had a half full minute and a half. So I I started like really cutting myself down to a minute at the most. Also so that you can when you post on Instagram, you can like see how many views you're getting and all of that. I just feel like it's more helpful with that way. And I love Instagram like I haven't really I post stuff on Tick tock, but I'm not really a big Tick Tock owl. So I'm still chugging away on the Insta, and then I put stuff on YouTube to tick tock is still the sketchy. Yes, so yeah,

Michele Baci:

stay away. Yeah, I

Sophie Spiers:

can say I just always get on there. And I'm like, I don't feel like this is for me. I'm not I sometimes I enjoy it, but it's just not my thing.

Michele Baci:

I feel like it's a fad and I just don't have time for it. Like maybe someday, right?

Sophie Spiers:

I know. Well, I had a friend who worked for I have a friend who worked for tik tok, and she was, you know, a couple years ago, she was like Sophie, you have to get on tik tok. It's gonna blow up. And I'm like, the last thing I need is another dumb app that doesn't go anywhere. No, lo and behold,

Michele Baci:

I mean, here we are number one app in America. Exactly. But also stealing your information. So right?

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah, who knows? Who knows how they're gonna get his videos with me and wigs and like, talking about boobs? So good luck to them.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, it's probably not the most helpful to like steal your identity, but it's still Tick Tock. Do you have a favorite character that you do or that you've done before?

Sophie Spiers:

Um, oh, that's I so I started doing this one celebrity in LA during quarantine. And it was just, it was just like a parody of what a celebrity might be focused on during a pandemic. And I did one video a few weeks ago that I really liked. So that was like, I felt it Yes, I was using the title of celebrity but I just feel like this is a lot of people's attitudes, which was like, do you know when like the pan when something affects everyone a lot, but it doesn't affect you at all. Like that was this pandemic for me and just making all these statements about like The effect of the pandemic but really, it didn't affect you at all. That makes me laugh. And then, I mean, I'm, I don't want to broadcast this because I feel now like, embarrassed by it. But before we knew what was happening with Britney Spears, I was doing an impression of her. Yeah, it wasn't one of your early Yeah, one of my early things just because I was doing a podcast with a friend and all of a sudden I had this impression come out, and it was like, Hey, guys, I'm gonna show you a little bit of my quarantine routine. And it was like, an actual Britney accent. And so I started working on it and I those videos got a lot of views. But then things started to get a little dicey er with her and I was like, Oh, I want to be a supporter and not like making fun of her. So I mean, not that I was making fun of her, but I could see people seeing it that way.

Michele Baci:

We didn't we didn't have all the information yet the documentary. Exactly. But you do like you listen to Brittany's social media stuff her court here and she does sound like a character. So

Sophie Spiers:

she does, right. And it was mostly the voice that I thought was funny, you know, whatever. She wants to do more power to her like she can twirl around and dance and put on outfits Good for her. But you know, if a comic can do a voice, then a comics gonna do a voice. Like, yeah,

Michele Baci:

I was. I won't hold it against you. I still have to watch that documentary. I've been like working up to it and like, Am I immensely good place? No.

Sophie Spiers:

Well, no, I know. I, I had trouble with the documentary because I felt like I've seen this trend and a lot of documentaries, which is where they use, like online experts, which are really like online sleuths, which are really just people who love the internet. They're using them as like actual sources of information. And I'm like, it just seems irresponsible from like a journalism point of view. They actually make a documentary about Britney and someone who doesn't know Brittany and just knows her internet presence could talk like an expert on like,

Michele Baci:

I don't know, like it's not a journalist. It's just someone with a Twitter account.

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah, like that. That documentary? Oh, God, it was either Cecil Cecil Hotel or don't fuck with cats. And someone was literally either. Oh my god, I recommend it because they're both ridiculous and entertaining. But they someone is literally listed and credited as a. What was it internet sleuth? And I was like, that is just someone who discovered YouTube early on and then went ham with it. Like that's not an actual job.

Michele Baci:

Can that just be anybody with like, why?

Sophie Spiers:

I'm an internet sleuth? Like, you've got a question about JLo and Ben Affleck like I'm there. I've got the answers. Yeah, all internet slopes.

Michele Baci:

You want to check someone's criminal record? I got it right here. It's not that hard. Oh, that's crazy. I'll yeah, I'll watch it soon. Well, we'll talk about it in real life soon. Oh, definitely. Um, do you have any advice for back to therapy? Like someone who wants to seek out therapy? Or maybe they know they need meds? And like, how do they start that process when it's so like, intimidating,

Sophie Spiers:

honestly, come to me, I love finding people. That's a good. I mean, I think I think either you reach a point where you just want someone to help you or you reach a point where you feel willing to take the risk. And I think it's just finding, like, it can feel daunting to look online and see all these options and not know who's going to work for you. And that's just part of the process. Like, it's like dating kind of, you know, you don't know if someone's going to be a good fit, but you should try it because otherwise you're not going to have the opportunity. So I use Psychology Today, actually, which is how I found my psychiatrists and therapists. And I, you can filter it by like who you know, if you want male or female, what issues you want to deal with. And then I really just like would go to their websites and look at their descriptions and see what spoke to me. I feel like you get a vibe off of those.

Michele Baci:

And I also do do like, message a few of them are just the first one worked out.

Sophie Spiers:

I messaged a couple one woman didn't pick up her phone ever. So I was like, This is not a good sign. And then I messaged this company and they got back to me really or this practice and they got back to me quickly. And were so professional and I felt like I was in good hands. So that's why I kept going. I also think people get afraid of like, the logistics people get overwhelmed by logistics of having to call someone having to admit to wanting therapy. It seems like a big deal. I don't have an answer to that other than like, get over it because it'll be really helpful. And on the other side, you won't care that you had to make a call and like schedule an appointment. You'll be glad that you did. Yeah, just start. Just start Exactly.

Michele Baci:

And especially like the appointment thing, like can I set an appointment and to my week it's like, try it.

Sophie Spiers:

Right if you can fit seven panic attacks into your week, then you can Setting appointment like,

Michele Baci:

yeah, you'll probably get more done with that one appointment.

Sophie Spiers:

Exactly right. You might limit it to three a week, and then you'll really be cooking.

Michele Baci:

Yeah. It's like how many depression cries Can I have in a week? I think of that my limits,

Sophie Spiers:

right? And then, yeah, I was like, I'm tired of doing this all the time. If I could just have an appointment a week, and I didn't know if it would work. I mean, I was skeptical. I sound like a contestant on The Bachelor. Like, I didn't know I was skeptical going into this. But I could just feel it like I got there. And I wanted to tell someone what was on my mind. And I didn't want to tell a friend or family I wanted to tell a stranger who'd be able to look at me and be like, I'm sorry, you're feeling this way. Let's try to deal with it.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, like your friend or family, you know them too well. So whenever, whatever their responses as good intentions as they may have, it's like, you're never going to perceive it the way you would from a therapist who's like, this person doesn't know you, like they're not trying to placate you or lying to you or they're not trying to make themselves feel better. It's like, this is someone. We're doing their job, right. Totally different.

Sophie Spiers:

Like there's nothing worse than crying, and like needing someone to help you and then they start crying too. And you're like, Okay, this is just a huge mess. Yeah, you stole my moment. Right, exactly. stealing my thunder. So, you know, and also, I think with a stranger, you're better behaved like, you can't blame them.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, really? Just focus. You want to get that that hour's worth.

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah, exactly. I mean, I am the type of person who finishes a meal because she paid for it. Even if she's not hungry. So like, I get that hour's worth.

Michele Baci:

Oh, yeah. I just ate a mediocre pumpkin pie. I brought it home. August pumpkin pie my stomach. Yeah, it was. It was from a bakery. I don't know how they made it. That sounds delicious. I love pumpkin pie. It wasn't bad as a leftover pie. That's good. Yeah, it turned out okay.

Sophie Spiers:

I ate some old soup yesterday because I got back from vacation and hadn't gone to the grocery store. And I found it in my cabinet. And I ate stale crackers with it. And I was like, the limits that I will go to to not have to walk across the street to Trader Joe's are astounding.

Michele Baci:

you're that close to Trader Joe's and literally like, I can see it from my house. You know, that's funny. I made it. Because you're getting back from the east coast. You're like, I don't need to make another journey to the store. Exactly. limit that. Totally. Okay, well, I think we can move on to the roulette wheel.

Unknown:

Okay.

Michele Baci:

Here it is. Normally, I just give it a spin. And then you could tell me your response to something I have been wanting to ask every guest. Is there anything you want to vent about? Is that anything really piss you off? Or you want to like ramble for a minute in your life? Anything that comes to mind?

Sophie Spiers:

Yes, it's happening to me, right? I mean, where do I even start, but one thing I've bent about, it's very personal to me. And it's how much I sweat, which like, I and I talk about it all day long. I am always hot. And I literally, I just had the guy who works in my building the maintenance man come and look at my air conditioner for the second time because I'm like, I swear it's not working. It's always hot in this room. And he's like, I measured it with it. thermometer is the same temperature as the rest of the room and I'm like, Oh my god, I am just like a menopausal woman and I don't know what to do about it. It's alarming. And I hear like my roommate and I, I think 50% of our conversation throughout the day is sweating. I'm sweating. I'm so sweaty. Right? I'm boiling. But the roommates also sweating. He's also sweating. So we're both just like too sweaty people complaining about being sweaty. But I really feel like I'm sweaty or

Michele Baci:

Yeah, I guess you guys need like a lot of fans maybe a pool?

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah, I think that's what it comes down to is like I need a house on a cliff with a pool. And people like bathing me and ice chips and then maybe I'll be okay.

Michele Baci:

I need a kitchen stocked to Trader Joe's so I don't have to go.

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah, yeah, right. Maybe if I didn't have to shop I wouldn't be such a sweaty mess. That's funny. Thank you for Red Sea and sharing. Thank you for making it a safe space.

Michele Baci:

Of course I try. So let's give you a spin. If you could choose a superpower, what would you choose? And why?

Sophie Spiers:

Oh my god. Um, I would Okay, so I would actually choose the ability to fly. Because I have these dreams. My dad and I both have them. Really once in our family that we're connected to them. I dream that I'm flying and I can feel it so vividly. I feel it in my stomach and I just like take off with my arms and I'm flapping and I'm flying above the clouds. And it's just like whenever I need to get out of any situation or I want to have fun. I'm just flying and I'm like how great would that be? If I could just like If I were in a bar and some guy was boring me talking about his love of stocks, I would just be like tah tah and flutter my way. Fly away

Michele Baci:

as a as a person, though not as a bird, right as a person. No, I don't want to be a bird. They smell weird, but I would like to fly. Yeah, I would just like to keep my human sweat and right. Right, just. I also like pretty good one.

Sophie Spiers:

I don't want the power to be able to poop on people. Because that's a big power. And I think I would abuse it.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, it might be hard to control once you get it. Oh, yeah. If you could, I would. Yeah. Like, how many enemies do I have? I

Sophie Spiers:

can make some I can make a lot. Yeah. But then people think that it's good luck. So you have to be careful because I don't want the wrong people thinking I'm wishing them luck.

Michele Baci:

Okay, fair enough. Yeah. Got to target them carefully. Exactly. I think we have time for another. Okay, awesome. Oh, what have you been obsessed with? Oh, ever or lately? Whatever comes to mind.

Sophie Spiers:

Like cuz I'm like, Oh, I was obsessed with one guy senior year of high school. But okay, lately? Does he deserve the attention? No, he doesn't. And that's why I'm not going to discuss whatever they been obsessed with. Oh my god, I think I'm obsessed with so okay. This isn't a new thing for me. But as of late, anytime that I want to treat myself to anything. I haven't gone to TJ Maxx or Marshall's

Michele Baci:

as a good one.

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah. And I have always been obsessed because like my mother raised us to love going to Marshalls and TJ Maxx and like I to get to the ones near me It's by the it's a by the grove. It's like kind of a it's so close. But it's like an annoying parking lot and whatever. But if I'm in a mood or I want to celebrate something I just don't like I'm going to TJ Maxx like a middle aged like Mother of 12. And I went oh sweet,

Michele Baci:

like a little worried about you with the Metapod and the teaching. No.

Sophie Spiers:

I'm like, way too settled in my midlife crisis for 28 years old. But I love tea days. And I was there Sunday and I spent a ton of money and I was like, You know what, I don't even feel bad because I needed these loofahs and like this fur coat even though it's August.

Michele Baci:

Yeah, at your bargain hunting. I mean, no one else is gonna buy that fur coat.

Sophie Spiers:

Right? And like 50 makeup products that are only 399 each feels a lot better than buying like 350 dollar makeup products. So

Michele Baci:

you're not supporting the big brands. You're not supporting Kylie Jenner. It's TJ Maxx.

Sophie Spiers:

Exactly. It's something cheaper. It's keeping me humble.

Michele Baci:

I like that obsession. Yeah. It keeps you grounded ties you to your roots.

Sophie Spiers:

Exactly. I could be a millionaire and I guarantee I would still do all my shopping at those two places. And it's funny because like, I have a sister. I have two sisters. But my youngest sister is a fashionista obsessed with big brands and like true art, you know, style and whatever. And she will know if Santa Claus brings her a gift. That is it. That's from one of those places, even though if it has no tag, no other identifier. She's like I noticed with TJ Maxx I don't want it for like, my parents know that they can give me all gifts from TJ Maxx and I'll be over the moon about it.

Michele Baci:

That's funny. The differences in siblings,

Sophie Spiers:

right? It's also like an oldest versus youngest situation, I think.

Michele Baci:

Probably she gets more She's the youngest.

Sophie Spiers:

Exactly. And I am fine with the cheap things from TJ is that you know, keep me humble.

Michele Baci:

Are you are you the oldest sibling?

Sophie Spiers:

Yeah, I am. And then I have two sister three years younger and then a sister six years younger.

Michele Baci:

Okay. I I'm also the oldest with two sisters and a brother. Oh, I didn't know that. I think I'm the scrappiest of us all. But who knows? Yeah, I'm scrappy. I like that. Yeah, you got to be the first one in the bunch. You got to survive.

Sophie Spiers:

Totally. I always joke with my mom. I'm like, oh, have already raised two kids. Like

Michele Baci:

I feel like I raised three.

Sophie Spiers:

Even though I give my parents full credit. I do feel like we had a hand. I don't know about you. But I did.

Michele Baci:

I was a third parent for Yeah, yeah. Well, Sophie, this has been so nice. Please tell us where to find you online. Anything you'd like to promote?

Sophie Spiers:

I would like to promote myself. Please do thank you. Check out my Instagram. Now it is at Sophie spiers comedy. Spiers is S-P-I ers I know that's like, I feel like the story of my life is people confused about my name. So as Michele said, if you go to my bio, you'll see that it's spiers, bitch.

Michele Baci:

Yeah. It's like you got to throw in the word pie somehow. Like it's the word pie in there. Yeah. Oh, true. Yeah, spot s s py Yeah, Rs Rs. It's not the easiest, but I would remember it. Will you like pI? So I know my audience. Yeah, there you go. Well, thanks, Sophie, I'll talk to you soon.

Sophie Spiers:

Thank you so much for having me.

Michele Baci:

Of course. Hey, I want to thank you personally for listening to the podcast. This has been Therapy Roulette, where I give you consent to vent. I would love to keep making episodes and putting out this podcast into the world. And in order to do that, people have to find out about it and they have to listen. So please leave a review. If you have 10 seconds to spare, reviews go a long way. Any app, any place on the internet, please leave a good review. Please tell your friends about the podcast. You could explain it, say it's about an honest mental health conversation. It's a little bit funny. It's a little bit deprecating, or don't explain it at all. And just send them a airdrop link and boom, they h ve it in their phone. Thank y u so much for listening. I w ll be back with a new episode. N t next Thursday but the f llowing Thursday.

Theme Song:

Therapy Roulette Consent to Vent / Trauma disguised as comedy / Therapy Roulette: Consent to Vent / If you dont have problems, then youre likely repressing sh*t and you should find a therapist/ (Whos not me)